Every Guy You Date is Going to be the Wrong One Until He is the One

This title can also be “Every Woman You Date is Going to be the Wrong One Until She is the One.” The truth is the same, it’s just that I have lived the title.

What this means is you are going to kiss a lot of frogs to get your prince. I lived this title so I have kissed a lot of frogs. Thankfully I also chose to not kiss some of those dudes. Yeah for me!  I don’t have regrets. You don’t necessarily have to kiss those frogs either. Yeah for you! You have boundaries.

Note also that this title does not mean you can change a man to become the one. Stop that lie right now. Stop contorting yourself so this “match” becomes a true match. It is not. It simply is not.

I was talking to a pretty awesome young woman lately who was telling me about a date she had.  It was a good one, a fun one. But the fella has some pretty obvious red lights. She immediately shamed herself for always being attracted to the wrong type of men.  I could practically hear the messaging inside her head. I stopped her berating of herself right there with this truth: She’s only going to marry one man.  But she’s going to have to meet a lot of men to find that one man.  That means every guy but one is going to be the wrong type of man. 

She is a boundaried person. She has a team. She chooses wisely on who she dates.  She should be carrying no shame that she is doing wrong by enjoying a date with a guy, extending the guy generous assumptions because she is boundaried, and then finding out his red lights. It is what it is. And she had a great time. Nothing is wrong with her. She is not a loser girl only attracted to loser boys. Every guy she dates but one is going to be the wrong type of man.

Do you know why she is not a loser girl only attracted to loser boys? She is a boundaried person. She has a team. She chooses wisely on who she dates. Yes, I am repeating myself here because it is that important.

Brave dating practice:  You have everything inside you that someone is seeking.  Which means she is not a loser attracting the wrong type of man. She just gave a good character guy a chance and he was a frog. That is it. Eventually she will find her love for a lifetime.

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