Every Guy You Date is Going to be the Wrong One Until He is the One

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This title can also be “Every Woman You Date is Going to be the Wrong One Until She is the One.” The truth is the same, it’s just that I have lived the title.

What this means is you are going to kiss a lot of frogs to get your prince. I lived this title so I have kissed a lot of frogs. Thankfully I also chose to not kiss some of those dudes. Yeah for me!  I don’t have regrets. You don’t necessarily have to kiss those frogs either. Yeah for you! You have boundaries.

Note also that this title does not mean you can change a man to become the one. Stop that lie right now. Stop contorting yourself so this “match” becomes a true match. It is not. It simply is not.

I was talking to a pretty awesome young woman lately who was telling me about a date she had.  It was a good one, a fun one. But the fella has some pretty obvious red lights. She immediately shamed herself for always being attracted to the wrong type of men.  I could practically hear the messaging inside her head. I stopped her berating of herself right there with this truth: She’s only going to marry one man.  But she’s going to have to meet a lot of men to find that one man.  That means every guy but one is going to be the wrong type of man. 

She is a boundaried person. She has a team. She chooses wisely on who she dates.  She should be carrying no shame that she is doing wrong by enjoying a date with a guy, extending the guy generous assumptions because she is boundaried, and then finding out his red lights. It is what it is. And she had a great time. Nothing is wrong with her. She is not a loser girl only attracted to loser boys. Every guy she dates but one is going to be the wrong type of man.

Do you know why she is not a loser girl only attracted to loser boys? She is a boundaried person. She has a team. She chooses wisely on who she dates. Yes, I am repeating myself here because it is that important.

Brave dating practice:  You have everything inside you that someone is seeking.  Which means she is not a loser attracting the wrong type of man. She just gave a good character guy a chance and he was a frog. That is it. Eventually she will find her love for a lifetime.

(Photo credit: http://wallpaperbackgrounds.com/wallpaper/15190)

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